Complications

            Life is a complicated mess filled with inconsistencies and contradictions. Particularly life in relation to humans and how we view and interact with the world.

Take our brains’ view on change, for example. We hate change with a fiery, burning passion. We like things to be predictable and consistent. Yet, if it is predictable and consistent, we get bored and go stir crazy, with our brains demanding something new. If we rearrange a room, we’ll adapt to it quickly, with our brains not minding very much – but don’t you dare return the room to an old arrangement! No, then something is clearly out of place and wrong.

            Similarly, people often speak of wishing they didn’t have to work a job so that they can accomplish more of what they want to do. However, if you speak to people in such a position, you’ll quickly learn that they wish they had a job to help fill their time. Because having all the time in the world to do whatever you want somehow takes away from the enjoyment of doing what you want.

            We come up with morals to clearly define right and wrong, and very soon break into factions because some things that are clearly right contradict other things that are clearly right, and some things that are wrong contradict other things that are clearly wrong. Ideas that seem so simple to one person appear nonsensical to another – and both can back up their perspectives with valid arguments.

            We seek freedom while binding ourselves with laws – though, of course, the laws are required to prevent ourselves from violating others’ freedoms, and to protect our own. We try to understand the world better, yet as soon as we discover something that doesn’t match what we believe, we’re more likely to dismiss the new information as being incorrect or inconsequential.

            We pay people money to go out and raise money. We have annual feasts when, agriculturally, food is the most difficult to come by. We spend our best years working to achieve dreams we’ll be too old to enjoy by the time we achieve them. We fight wars to achieve peace.

            And as I go through all the strange and confusing contradictions in life, I notice that the common factor is humans. How we view the world. How we treat each other. How we examine and categorize things.

            And I wonder... is life really so full of paradoxes? Perhaps life is actually extremely simple, and we overcomplicate it in our efforts to understand.

Check out my YouTube channel where I tell the stories of my D&D campaigns.

Click here to find the charity anthology containing a couple of my short stories.

Also, make sure you check out my wife's blog and her website.


If there's any subject you'd like to see me ramble on about, feel free to leave a comment asking me to do so.

Building a Playable World

            This week, I managed to get my nose to the grindstone working on a big project I started back in June. This is a campaign setting for Dungeons and Dragons.

            Back when I was in the planning stages for the D&D marathon for Cystic Fibrosis, I was talking with the Dungeon Master of the weekly game I play in and the idea was floated that I could eventually start running a second game at the board game cafe. I liked the idea, but at the same time I prefer to be a player rather than a DM. At the same time, I knew that there was a waiting list and it would be great for the gaming community.

            So, naturally, I began thinking about the possibilities for games I could run. What did I want to see in a game? What would be fun for me to run, and fun for players to play? And that’s when a seed took root in my mind.

            One of the things that makes D&D such a great game is its versatility. You can do absolutely anything with it. Even in the most complex video game, there is a limit to the decisions a player can make – they can be given a great amount of freedom, and still be chained down by the limited options. In D&D, there are no limitations – yet the games frequently take on the same shape of “Here is your quest”, go to the dungeon, get the reward. There’s often plotlines and political situations woven in, but it doesn’t take advantage of D&D’s true ability to do anything. I feel that this is largely due to the players, having been trained by video games and society’s expectations, don’t necessarily understand how much freedom they have – and they don’t necessarily understand the depth of the world they’ve been thrown into.

            And so, I came up with an idea for a world that will (hopefully) open the players’ minds to all they can do: a world where the players are colonizing a “new world”. So, rather than being thrown into a world where there are kingdoms and empires and complex political structures that they know nothing about, the players will be put into a world that is as strange to the non-player-characters around them as it is to them. This puts the players at the centre of everything as a new society is established, and it gives them the freedom to do absolutely whatever they want. Do they want to help establish a settlement? Do they want to go off and explore the new world? The world is entirely open for them to choose what to do.

            Now, obviously, from a DM’s perspective, a world like that is a bit challenging to run. There needs to be plots to keep the players engaged, and in a world so free and open, it is hard to know what to prepare for the game. So, I started writing up the campaign setting – which is, essentially, a description of the world, everything in it, and guidelines for making the world easier for the DM to run. It is an immense task, but hey – I’m part of the Alliance of Worldbuilders; building worlds is what we do.

            So far, it is coming along well. I’ve outlined the world, its history, and the basics for how the game functions. The functions need a lot of work, but I’ll get them done eventually.

            This week, however, I was focusing on a very fun task: monsters. Even though this world lacks civilization (and, largely, because of that), this world is crawling with monsters. So, I combed through D&D’s monster manual and cherry picked monsters to have established societies in this world. Then I created those societies and figured out what politics they had, both within themselves and with all the others.

            It was so much fun and, let me tell you, I can’t wait until I’ve completed this setting and I get to see it in action. Who knows? I may even decide it’s good enough to publish through the Dungeon Masters’ Guild.

Click here to find the charity anthology containing a couple of my short stories.

Also, make sure you check out my wife's blog and her website.


If there's any subject you'd like to see me ramble on about, feel free to leave a comment asking me to do so.

Truth or Satire?

            A few years ago, I found myself reading an article about a recent study. The article talked about how this study, funded by a major oil corporation, had found that an increase in solar power would kill the sun faster, literally sucking the energy out of it to make our electricity.

            At the time, I was unaware that this was a satirical journalism website. Nothing clearly labelled it as such. However, as I simply couldn’t believe what the ridiculous article claimed, I started doing research to find out the validity. Before I discovered t was a satire site, I found myself going through the comments, seeing if people were believing what the article claimed.

            Most didn’t. Likely, many were aware that the whole article was a joke. However, there were some who fervently believed that this was true – solar energy was sucking energy out of the sun and would cause it to burn out faster.

            Since then, I have seen numerous satirical articles shared on social media by people who think they are real. Because they share some of the views being mocked by the satirical tone, they readily believe the articles without taking the time to check the information.

            It is so indicative of society. We see something official looking, so we automatically believe it. Researching takes too much time and effort. So, if we want or fear it to be true, we’ll believe it.

            On the rare occasion that someone wants to look into the validity of what they’re reading, it’s nearly impossible to get a confirmation unless you can get to the source. With the internet, information is right at our fingertips – but so is misinformation.

            Sarcastic and satirical people often make the mistake of thinking others understand their sense of humour. Unfortunately, there are a whole lot of literal people in the world, who take everything at face value. It’s no wonder there are so many people with no understanding of each other.

            Adding to the trouble is the requirement for news to be entertainment. I saw an episode of Gilmore Girls the other day where the main character, aspiring to be a journalist, had her writing criticised for not having her opinions in it. It’s the sad truth about our news these days – it’s all about the opinions of the people presenting it.

            What we really need is a news service called something like “Just the Facts” which presents nothing but the facts of a situation. Then people are given the freedom to decide what they think for themselves.

            But, that wouldn’t be entertaining enough, would it? And it sounds like a lot of work. Why would we want to make up our own minds about things when it’s so much simpler to agree with someone else? There’s no need to think when you can blindly follow.

Click here to find the charity anthology containing a couple of my short stories.

Also, make sure you check out my wife's blog and her life coaching website.


If there's any subject you'd like to see me ramble on about, feel free to leave a comment asking me to do so.

Is Charlie Freedom?

            I have said many times before that I live under a rock – as such, it takes something really big in the news to find its way to me. Such is the case with the Charlie Hebdo attack this past week.

            For those who haven’t heard of it yet, last Wednesday two gunmen attacked the headquarters of Charlie Hebdo (a weekly satirical newspaper in France), killing twelve people and wounding another eleven. The attack led to a global cry to support free speech.

            On the surface, it is a very simple matter. People were silenced for the ideas they expressed and the world has spoken up saying we’ll stand behind Charlie Hebdo and the right to free speech. I thought it was incredible, at first, until I looked into more facts and the matter became far more complicated.

            As I mentioned earlier, Charlie Hebdo is a satirical paper – more than that, it is a far left-wing one, openly poking fun at all religions and politics, sometimes in very vulgar ways. This particular attack was carried out by a pair of Muslims who saw their Prophet being made fun of in the paper.

            Now, does that justify murder? No, of course not – nothing does. Their religion wasn't the only one being made fun of and none of the others took this sort of drastic action. However, I think that this is a good time to stop and think on what freedom of speech actually means.

            I'veblogged before about freedom and how complicated it actually is, and this situation goes to demonstrate that fact. You see, the freedom to say anything you want doesn't mean you should say it. A big part of freedom is responsibility and the biggest responsibility is respecting other peoples’ freedom. The freedom to think, believe, say and do as they will.

            When you take that freedom of speech and start throwing it in people’s faces, you are expressing your freedom by denying others’ theirs. That is what Charlie Hebdo does, at least as far as I can gather. They make jokes about whatever they can and, when people say they get hurt, they claim “free speech!” This same claim is regularly made all over the internet by people who have hurt others. “I have free speech, so you aren't allowed to get mad at me for what I say, even if I am stomping all over everything you believe.”

            I'm confident that the contents of Charlie Hebdo have never been intended to hurt anyone. Quite the opposite – it’s meant to make people laugh! Words are powerful, though. That’s why people try to ban certain books. We’re taught from childhood that “sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me”. It’s a lie. Words hurt – we just tell ourselves that they don’t to try and make them hurt less.

            Humour is all well and good, but why must it come at the expense of others? It’s important to be able to laugh at yourself, but not everyone has been able to acquire that skill. All some people can see are others laughing at them and what they care about. Of course they’re going to retaliate.

            Following the attack, a huge campaign has started: “Je Suis Charlie”, or “I Am Charlie” - the support of free speech. On one level, I completely support it because freedom is so important. At the same time, I cannot condone the content of Charlie Hebdo which, while intended to be funny, can also be inflammatory and insulting – taking freedom of speech to the extreme that spits in the face of others’ freedom.

            Now, there is a simple solution to this sort of conundrum: simply don’t read things that offend you. Is it Charlie Hebdo’s fault that the attackers read their paper? No. That doesn't stop people though – it seems to be in human nature to poke at wounds; to seek out that which causes us pain. We’re drawn like bugs to lamps, with this dread fascination, toward things we know we should keep away from.

            In the end, it doesn't really matter, though, does it? The cards have been played and there are only two possible outcomes: we raise our voices in support of Charlie Hebdo or we are seen to be bowing to the wishes of the attackers – a success for them that will spread the word worldwide that violence can end free speech and more attacks will quickly follow until everyone is afraid to say anything. It’s ironic, really, that this attack has led to the exact opposite of what the attackers intended – partially because we've been left with no other options. We have to stand behind Charlie, or witness the death of freedom.

            So, I guess I don’t have a choice. I am Charlie. I have to be, or I encourage more tragedies.

            I wish that this situation could have been resolved without anyone being hurt or killed. I wish that Charlie Hebdo hadn't become the face of freedom. I wish there was more humour in the world that didn't rely hurting people.

            I wish I lived in a world where I didn't have to support something I don't believe in to support something I do believe in.

Click here to find the charity anthology containing a couple of my short stories.

If there's any subject you'd like to see me ramble on about, feel free to leave a comment asking me to do so.

Don't Do Unto Others

            Anyone who has spent a large amount of time on the internet has, at one point or another, run into the trolls. Some are harmless jokers, some are pranksters who sometimes go a little too far and some are just bullies looking for someone to pick on.

            In most cases (the exception being some – not all – of the bullies), these people don’t actually intend malice – in fact, in my experience a lot of them don’t even know they are doing any harm! These are just people finding ways to entertain themselves and, unfortunately, people are hurt as a by-product.

            On occasion, these trolls are confronted about what they are doing. Their response is generally the same: they are exercising their right to free speech. They feel that being asked to stop imposes upon their own freedom.

            In a blog post earlier this year, I touched on the fact that true freedom can’t exist because, as part of a society of free people, having freedom comes with responsibilities. The biggest of which is to respect other people’s freedom.

            I recently came up with an excellent way of illustrating this point. As a general rule, people are legally permitted to defend themselves if they are attacked. In other words, if a person walks up to you and throws a punch, they are essentially giving you permission to hit them back.

            Technically that person is allowed to throw that punch – after all, having freedom means they’re free to do what they like. But it is also your freedom, as well as theirs, to not be punched. By violating your freedom through choosing to punch you, they are at the same time violating their own freedom by inviting you to punch them back.

            Therefore, the way I see it, by exercising their freedom, they are infringing upon their own.

            The same goes for words, spoken or on the internet, or any form of communication for that matter. Any time someone says something hurtful or offensive, they are infringing upon the very freedom they are trying to express.

            There’s a very old phrase used to explain this idea: “Do unto others as you would have done to you.” Very often it is interpreted as, “Do unto others what they done did to you”, better known as, “An eye for an eye.” The problem is that this just leads to a never-ending cycle. Think of kids having a poking war in a car, each one poking the other because they were poked first. Strange to think that adults behave that way – and countries, for that matter.

            So, next time you run across one of those cyber-bullies (perhaps the ones in real life, too), just laugh to yourself in the knowledge that with each nasty thing they say, all they are doing is undermining their own freedom, giving them a paradoxical existence. Then feel free to ignore them and move on because, as a paradox, they can’t possibly exist and are therefore not worth listening to.

            I'm thinking we could also change that “Do unto others” phrase into one more readily understandable. I'm in favour of “Don’t do to someone what you don’t want them to do to you because if everyone respects everyone else you never have to worry about getting hurt.” Okay, so it’s a bit of a mouthful, but it gets right to the point and doesn't leave much room for misinterpretation. Plus, in a few generations we’ll be able to say “Don’t do to someone” and the person doing the doing will instantly stop just so they won’t have to hear the rest of the saying.

Click here to find the charity anthology containing a couple of my short stories.

If there's any subject you'd like to see me ramble on about, feel free to leave a comment asking me to do so.

Social Conditioning

            I’d like to take a moment to talk to you about social conditioning. It’s a term I like to think I came up with, though I'm sure someone beat me to it. Yup. I just looked it up. Wiki defines it as “the sociological process of training individuals in a society to respond in a manner generally approved by society”. Or, as I like to put it, a very mild form of brainwashing that not only has happened to all of us, but we participate in doing to other people every day.

            For example, if I were to ask you what colour little boys and girls wear, even if it isn't your answer, your first thought will most likely be that boys wear blue and girls wear pink. If I told you that mom is working around the house, you’ll picture her cleaning something, while if I were to have said dad is working around the house you would have seen him fixing something.

            Gender stereotypes are just the easiest way of showing social conditioning. They exist because they've been trained into us for generations. We are now trying to counteract it by saying “It’s okay; your gender doesn't matter, you can do any job you want!” but, even as we say it, a small part of our minds are rebelling. It’s true, gender doesn't matter, but these roles are so ingrained into our minds that we have trouble taking those words and putting them into action.

            When they were raising us, my parents made a great effort to keep my brother and I from even being aware of these stereotypes and they did a fantastic job of it! They both shared in the work around the house, they both loved to cook, they both worked at the business they both owned. I remember a time when I owned a doll and never thought anything of it. Then school happened.

            School is the first place outside our homes that we are exposed to social conditioning – and it’s not from the teachers. It’s from the kids who are spouting out what they've learned from TV or their parents or grandparents. My brother was older, so he went to school first. Suddenly we went from being the best of friends to fighting all the time, because he learned about sibling rivalry. After I started school, I gave my doll away because boys didn't play with dolls. Suddenly we were infused with all of these stereotypes and pressure to follow them that we’d never had before. Luckily, neither of us had what we were raised to believe entirely squeezed out of us, but we did take a fair amount of residual damage. Neither of us ever quite fit in. I know my brother was bullied a fair amount and, while no one ever outright said it to me at the time, I've learned that many people’s first impression of me was that I was gay, simply because I didn't care about being masculine. I was happier being myself than trying to prove I was a man.

            This is just a small picture of what social conditioning is and what it does to people. Where does it come from? Well, mostly it’s from children, or, at least, they’re the ones doing it the most and the ones most susceptible to it. Where do they get their information from? Other children, parents, grandparents and TV. TV is actually one of the worst sources, because children often follow examples. In order to entertain us, shows need some sort of conflict and, as a result, there are some very despicable characters that we are exposed to, meanwhile there’s a child sitting there and watching for examples on how to behave.

            Most people go though their whole lives blissfully unaware of social conditioning – not surprising, since the only way to notice it is to stop and wonder why we do some of the things we do. I've always felt that it’s important to consider my motivations before taking action, which is how I first stumbled across the idea of social conditioning. Now I often stop to think, am I doing this because it’s part of who I want to be, or is it because society has trained me to act this way?

Click here to find the charity anthology containing a couple of my short stories.

If there's any subject you'd like to see me ramble on about, feel free to leave a comment asking me to do so.

Pho Freedom!

            My wife and I are currently self-employed, which gives us a lot of opportunities that not many people have. For one thing, we have almost complete control over our work schedules – although, in reality this means we work seven days a week. So, when my maternal grandfather gave up his licence and he and my grandmother still needed transportation to appointments, they gave me their car on the condition that I chauffeur them when needed. This was an excellent deal for me, because I actually had the free time for this. I was already giving my brother rides to work for the winter (so he wouldn't have to ride his motorcycle or get a car) and taking my paternal grandfather to the occasional appointment. Which is where this week’s story starts.

            I received a call from my paternal grandfather telling me that one of my cousins was much further south than he usually was, so would it be possible for me to drive him out to meet him and have lunch? Well, who am I to say no to a free lunch? Especially once it was suggested that we go to Colleen’s favourite restraunt. So it was that we went out to have pho.

            As this cousin lives considerably further north than me, I haven’t spent much time with him. I was astonished to find how much we had in common on our views of the world! I've always considered myself a bit of a philosopher, but my cousin had studied philosophy and my grandfather had studied some philosophy when he was becoming a minister. The resulting conversation at our table very likely melted the brains of any eavesdroppers.

            One of the most interesting things that came up was freedom. Now, freedom is a word we hear and use a lot, but it isn’t something we think about the meaning of. We just know we want it. The problem is that with freedom comes responsibility, which in its own is almost the same as not having freedom.

            For a person to be truly free, they need to be able to say and do whatever they want. The problem is that they are then able to harm others because to disallow them from harming others would be to eliminate their freedom. We see this problem across the internet all the time – people insulting others and telling people that try to stop them that they are free people, free to do what they want. This is true freedom, but it is only possible for one person to have, because for them to remain free, they must violate the freedoms of other – the freedom to be safe from the harms of others.

            The freedom that actually exists in this world has strings attached, because we (at least, most of us) believe that everyone should be free. So, as a free person, I now have the responsibility to temper my responses to other people, to restrain myself from saying things that would harm others. Why? Because to maintain my freedom, I must support the freedom of others.

            A perfect example is what I mentioned earlier about being self-employed. I'm free to make my own schedule and, as a result, I end up working seven days a week. If I didn't  I wouldn't be able to make enough money to remain self-employed to keep that freedom.

            Thus, freedom is something of a paradox. If you have it, it is something that you can’t abuse or you’ll lose it. I’d almost go as far as saying that freedom isn't actually something we want; it’s only something we think we want. My question then becomes: what do we want?

Click here to find the charity anthology containing a couple of my short stories.

If there's any subject you'd like to see me ramble on about, feel free to leave a comment asking me to do so.