Stories We Tell

            When I was six or so, my family was sitting around the breakfast table telling stories of the dreams we’d had. This wasn’t an irregular occurrence, but something different happened this time: my dad had a dream to share. Normally he only commented on how he didn’t dream, so when he commented that last night, he had a dream, he had our rapt attention.

            It was an extraordinary and hilarious tale about his encounter with an aggressive pink rhino, which he had eventually befriended. To this day I don’t know for sure if he made it up on the spot and wrote it down later, or if he’d prepared it in advance. It doesn’t really matter – what matters is that it was the start of something wonderful.

            I honestly don’t know how it happened, but it led to my dad coming into the grades 1-3 my brother and I both were in to tell the story of the Pink Rhino again, and the story was loved by the whole class – so much so that it became a regular thing. My dad began producing more Robert Munch-esque stories and telling them for my class. It wasn’t just the incredible stories themselves – it was the way he told them, which I would love to describe to you, but in truth it’s something you’d have to experience.

Some of the stories involved members of the class, like Pictures, a story about a talented artist in the class named Mallory whose pictures came to life when put on the refrigerator (causing no end of problems), or The Scratch – a story about the fight I had with Rotten Rosco, the most fearsome pirate to sail the Canadian highways, that he wrote over the weekend as an explanation for a huge scratch I’d gotten on my face from running into a tree. Others grew into massive class projects, like the Ordinary Story, a rhyming story about a boy and a girl who wander into the woods and befriend a troll – after this story, our class worked together to create an enchanted forest from plasticine.

            Looking back on that time, I find it incredible how many engaging and humorous stories he wrote, memorized, and told over the short three years I was in that classroom. It led to him joining the local storytellers’ guild and telling stories at a number of other venues as well – including an event for my wife’s homeschool group, before I even met her.

            Looking back on that, it’s no wonder that, with that in my background, I grew up with a passion for telling stories. However, there’s one conversation I had with my dad several years ago that has stuck with me ever since – it was the day he told me how impressed he was that I could write full length books. I looked at him in astonishment and told him that he could easily write a novel as well. I, myself, was (and am) still impressed with all his shorter stories. I’ve only written a few short stories in my time, and almost all of them leave an opening for more to happen – making them more like first chapters than short stories. Writing something novel-length is far easier to me.

            I think that was the first day I came to appreciate a key element of human nature: our tendency to be blind to that which makes us extraordinary because it comes easily to us. We think that, because we find it easy, everyone must find it easy, and that the things we find hard and that other people find easy means that those people are more extraordinary than us.

            We teach kids that everyone is unique and special, but we don’t go on to tell them what that actually means. It means that everyone has their own skills and talents, and those are what make them extraordinary. If something comes easily to you, that’s probably one of the things that makes you special. And those things you wish you could do that other people seem so good at, but that they seem to think it’s no big deal that they can do it? That’s what makes them special, and they just might admire you for the things you find to be easy.

            Sure, I’ll never be able to sit at the front of a room and captivate an audience with the way I tell a story – at least, not like my dad can – but I have my own ways of telling stories that are just as good. Not to mention, requiring far less energy to present. And quieter. Much quieter.

Check out my YouTube channel where I tell the stories of my D&D campaigns.

Click here to find the charity anthology containing a couple of my short stories.

Also, make sure you check out my wife's blog and her website.


If there's any subject you'd like to see me ramble on about, feel free to leave a comment asking me to do so.

Predispositions

            They say that first impressions are important. This is very true, but have you ever stopped to consider why? Why is it that the first thing you say to someone, when you don’t even know them, is so much more important than what comes after?

            The answer is predisposition. As humans, we like to make up our minds about things before we actually know about them. It sounds like a silly thing to do, I know, but we do it anyway. When we meet a person for the first time, we’re already deciding who we think they are before they even speak – before we know anything about them. And then, from our very first interactions with them, we react to them and choose how to treat them based off that predisposition.

            However, the predisposition goes on to do much more, unless something happens to change it (and it often takes a lot to shift those initial impressions). It shapes the entire relationship with that person, because they are viewed through a lens of that predisposition. For example, if you believe someone to be rude, you are more likely to interpret things they say as rude, regardless of their intent. If you believe that someone talks too much, you’ll notice every time they are talking and automatically assume they’re talking more than someone else. If you believe someone is intelligent, you’re more likely to pay attention to what they are saying than if you believe they are stupid – and you might entirely miss the brilliant ideas of the person you considered stupid because you disregarded them without even considering.

            As you may have noticed, I’m somewhat predisposed to believe that predispositions are bad. Are they, though? I think they can be, and often are, because we just let them do their thing and go along with our lives. We don’t give some people the chances they deserve – contrariwise, we give some people far more chances than they deserve.

            So, then, why do we do this? I think it is a survival instinct. In the natural world, it is important to make a decision quickly when determining if something is a threat. If something is approaching us, we have to decide how we’re going to handle it before it is close enough to slash at us or rear our throats out. The instinct helped us survive, and therefore it has lasted into the modern world, where it functions in a similar manner – deciding if there is a threat or not. Once again, it works to a degree, and it is important to us.

            So, is predisposition good or bad? I think it all depends on the person and their awareness of it. Predispositions are good so long as we know they are there and we know to question them – to allow ourselves to re-evaluate our first impressions. That way, we have the protection provided by the instinct, without allowing ourselves to treat people as what we think they are, rather than what they are.

            Of course, some predispositions are so strong that we don’t even give some people a chance to reveal who they actually are. That is the sort of predisposition that is the hardest to fight – but it is also the most important to fight. Otherwise they could grow to control our lives.

Click here to find the charity anthology containing a couple of my short stories.

Also, make sure you check out my wife's blog and her website.


If there's any subject you'd like to see me ramble on about, feel free to leave a comment asking me to do so.

Just Be Nice

            There’s been a whole lot of negativity flying around the world lately. Not that it’s a surprise. There are a lot of people angry about a lot of things right now – and many of them have good reason. Unfortunately, this is leading a lot of people to be uncivil.

            The trouble is that when everyone believes they are right (and who wouldn’t? Why would anyone bother holding an opinion they believe is wrong?), ideas that go against theirs tend to result in raised hackles. People get upset, and when people are upset they tend to stop listening. They will argue their point until all they can do to sway their similarly upset opponent is to insult them and claim they know nothing (I’m sure we can all think of a very prominent public figure who demonstrates this perfectly).

            Once a conflict devolves into this, there’s really no hope of resolution. The argument becomes a back-and-forth about nothing in particular and all it manages to achieve is to widen the divide.

            The gap is too big already.

            So, right now, more than ever, it is important to not spout negativity at others – no matter how right you are. Feel free to try to persuade people of your views, but keep it civil. If emotions are getting high, turn around and walk away.

            Because, no matter how right you are, if you make the choice to hurt someone, you are in the wrong. What’s more, every time you hurt someone, it becomes a weapon for the people opposing you in the future. It reflects poorly not only on you, but on everyone who shares in your beliefs. You may even inadvertently become a bully, without even noticing that’s what you’ve become.

            There are a lot of problems in the world right now. More than enough. Don’t become another one. Just be nice to people. You can still stand up for your beliefs without becoming belligerent, and you’ll be far more effective that way.

Click here to find the charity anthology containing a couple of my short stories.

Also, make sure you check out my wife's blog and her life coaching website.


If there's any subject you'd like to see me ramble on about, feel free to leave a comment asking me to do so.

Musings on Reality

            It seems to me that there are a lot of people in the world who believe themselves to be right. They look at the world and declare that “This is the way it is!” This wouldn’t be much of a surprise (or a problem) if they all agreed – but they don’t.

            How can this be? Morality I can understand being debated, as there are many grey areas, but about the actual facts of the world, how can people argue? How can people still believe that the world is flat, when there is proof it is not? Is it simply that they haven’t seen it with their own eyes and, therefore, will believe what makes the most sense to them?

            It seems a feeble argument to base a belief on. Are we, then, to believe that stars are fireflies that flew too high and got stuck in the sky, simply because we, ourselves, haven’t done the science to determine what they are? Are we, then, to question everything we’re told, for fear that it might be false? What a tiny existence we would live if each of us stopped trusting what we are taught and rely only on what we experience in our own lives.

            It could be, as some philosophers have said, that each of us lives in our own reality. It seems more likely to me that we all live in the same reality, but we each live within our own interpretations of it.

            How else can it be that there are so many people who know for a fact that what they believe is the one and only truth? How do they not see the irony that, while they are proclaiming the one true truth, another is proclaiming an opposing one true truth and that from the outside they both look identical?

            Is reality, then, a construct of ours that doesn’t exist, or a constant that we can only catch a glimpse of? I suspect we’re all too busy arguing amongst ourselves about what reality is for us to discover what is actually real. For, it seems to me, that the only way we can truly understand the vast universe we live in is to trust each other and pool our knowledge.

            Reality isn’t something that can be viewed from an extreme point of view; only by finding the middle point, where all views overlap, can we truly define what is real.

Click here to find the charity anthology containing a couple of my short stories.

Also, make sure you check out my wife's blog and her life coaching website.


If there's any subject you'd like to see me ramble on about, feel free to leave a comment asking me to do so.

Truth or Satire?

            A few years ago, I found myself reading an article about a recent study. The article talked about how this study, funded by a major oil corporation, had found that an increase in solar power would kill the sun faster, literally sucking the energy out of it to make our electricity.

            At the time, I was unaware that this was a satirical journalism website. Nothing clearly labelled it as such. However, as I simply couldn’t believe what the ridiculous article claimed, I started doing research to find out the validity. Before I discovered t was a satire site, I found myself going through the comments, seeing if people were believing what the article claimed.

            Most didn’t. Likely, many were aware that the whole article was a joke. However, there were some who fervently believed that this was true – solar energy was sucking energy out of the sun and would cause it to burn out faster.

            Since then, I have seen numerous satirical articles shared on social media by people who think they are real. Because they share some of the views being mocked by the satirical tone, they readily believe the articles without taking the time to check the information.

            It is so indicative of society. We see something official looking, so we automatically believe it. Researching takes too much time and effort. So, if we want or fear it to be true, we’ll believe it.

            On the rare occasion that someone wants to look into the validity of what they’re reading, it’s nearly impossible to get a confirmation unless you can get to the source. With the internet, information is right at our fingertips – but so is misinformation.

            Sarcastic and satirical people often make the mistake of thinking others understand their sense of humour. Unfortunately, there are a whole lot of literal people in the world, who take everything at face value. It’s no wonder there are so many people with no understanding of each other.

            Adding to the trouble is the requirement for news to be entertainment. I saw an episode of Gilmore Girls the other day where the main character, aspiring to be a journalist, had her writing criticised for not having her opinions in it. It’s the sad truth about our news these days – it’s all about the opinions of the people presenting it.

            What we really need is a news service called something like “Just the Facts” which presents nothing but the facts of a situation. Then people are given the freedom to decide what they think for themselves.

            But, that wouldn’t be entertaining enough, would it? And it sounds like a lot of work. Why would we want to make up our own minds about things when it’s so much simpler to agree with someone else? There’s no need to think when you can blindly follow.

Click here to find the charity anthology containing a couple of my short stories.

Also, make sure you check out my wife's blog and her life coaching website.


If there's any subject you'd like to see me ramble on about, feel free to leave a comment asking me to do so.

What is Evil? Really?

            The other day, Colleen asked me how I define evil. My reply was that I don’t, because evil implies someone who does harm through malicious intent. I feel that most people who cause harm do so unintentionally – or, at the very least, think they have the best intentions.

            It did get me thinking, though. If I really had to define evil, how would I do it? What causes people to cause harm?

            Greed was what I came up with first. Greed for wealth or greed for power or greed for anything, really. That’s where evil, if it truly exists, is most visible. It causes people to stockpile money, harming the economy by making less money available to go around. It causes politicians to lie so they can get elected. It starts wars over land or resources. Almost all evil can be linked back to greed.

            Yet, even most of those people don’t view themselves as evil. They feel they’re doing what they must, or perhaps what everyone else is doing.

            That got my mind on the track of how people can cause so much harm and either be unaware or think it’s okay. It brought me to the essence of what motivates people: what they believe. Someone who lives on the streets and must steal to survive might view those who do not help them as evil, and would they be wrong? Is it not more evil to allow someone to starve to death than to help them survive? At the same time, the people being stolen from would view the thief as evil, and would they be wrong? After all, stealing to feed oneself without concern for those being harmed is more evil than choosing to starve to death.

            Both sides have merit, yet neither will budge from their positions. Their views and beliefs are set in stone. They each know with certainty that they are good, and the other is evil.

            So it was that I arrived at the best definition of evil I could come up with.

            All it takes to be evil is to believe you are right and that there is no possibility you are wrong.

Click here to find the charity anthology containing a couple of my short stories.

If there's any subject you'd like to see me ramble on about, feel free to leave a comment asking me to do so.